Are you down?

So, we're transitioning Sadie to the whole sleeping on a flat surface, and we're also trying to move her into the putting herself to sleep when she's really tired mode. However, the child is not taking so well to putting herself to sleep. If mommy and daddy aren't cuddling her it's apparently not time to sleep. Thus, I walked in this evening to see her lying in her pack and play just staring up at her mobile with her arms and legs trussed up in a solid swaddle, her big eyes unblinking.

Basically she looked like a person in an insane asylum. That's why I have reservations about the whole being swaddled thing. I mean, I know it lets her sleep and all, but it also makes her appear crazy. I'm worried that by merely appearing to be crazy s may actually turn out to be crazy. I think that's why parents warn you time and again not to cross your eyes because they might stay that way. Thus, I propose we stop swaddling her, or she's going to grow up with a few screws loose.

s was sort of on a sleep strike today, so I was forced to carry her around the house all evening in her favorite position, essentially sitting down but using my back as the chair back and my arms as the seat, the position allows her to look around freely and avoid the annoying perpetual smile of her father, who desires that she smile back.

And that's just the thing, we've got a serious little baby. I don't know when babies are supposed to start laughing, but I'm pretty sure s won't even attempt a laugh until she's well into her teens. Sometimes I just want to sit her down and let her know that the world is going to be all right, but babies are sometimes hard to reason with, and the copious amounts of drool on her chin don't exactly inspire confidence in me that we're having a real heart to heart. I'm trying to teach her some signs, so I can figure out what she's so worried about.

a) Global warming-I'd explain to her that it's a hoax created by the liberal media and "scientists." I'll air quote the crap out of "scientists," so she knows to distrust them. Scientists, honey, are just people who weren't creative enough to get a degree in the humanities.

b) The political rhetoric being too stringent. I'll explain to s that political rhetoric has always been caustic. I mean, dudes used to shoot each other over disputes. Remember that old great milk commercial with Aaron burr? Of course, none of this will make sense to little s, so I'll just explain to her that the liberal media is trying to force "Obama care" down our throat, and that we're ready to take this country back, and we'll do it by any means necessary. I'll let her know that we only refer to it as "Obama care." Because, lil s, the best way to move forward is to move backward. She'll probably realize I'm a philosopher and stop worrying to much.

c) A general unhappiness best described as ennui. "Be a writer, kid," I'll tell her, and dance her to sleep to her current favorite song. No worries, I don't let her watch the video with all that dancing, which obviously leads to sin. However, I think she looks the hook because she thinks it's all about her since we've called her baby so many times.