Blogging the work day, why I dress up for work...hint

Dress up for work. Spend fifteen minutes attempting to roll sleeves of your dress shirt in a way that doesn't cause bunching in the sweater. Wind up being fifteen minutes late for work due to persistent bunching. Have a dialogue with yourself about whether glasses are stylish or nerdy. Take off glasses.

Drive to work. Park at old apartment building and be angry that no spots are available even though you don't have a parking pass. Cultivate peace by breathing deeply. Mentally compare the movies of Paul Thomas Anderson in your head on the way to work. Why is it so damn cold? Mentally curse yourself for dressing nice, which prevents you from being able to cover up your ears.

Arrive at work. Forestall the conversation about you dressing up with your co-worker by talking about work. Work is not usually your first topic of conversation. Finally get the compliment about wardrobe. Feel good.

Interact with fellow co-workers, neither of whom compliment you on nicely rolled sleeves. Mentally curse yourself for not wearing glasses that would have set the whole ensemble off. Blog about it. Secretly wonder if your boss checks your facebook account from random access points to see if you blog at work. Wonder why he knew that you blogged at all. Suspect boss of possible stalking. Push down fears as irrational. Push down fears and begin listening to Pandora minus headphones in an attempt to spice up the office. Wonder if you should put on the soundtrack to Dirty Dancing instead. Sweet Disposition comes on, do that thing you do where you throw your hand up and briefly chair dance. Check to make sure no staff or janitors will surprise you dancing in your cube.

Feel guilty when janitorial staff arrives and takes your recycling, which you know they don't actually recycle. Panic. Wonder how offensive it is for you to sneak out side door with your trash. Wonder if she'll be suspicious. Trash goes unrecycled. What the hell was all that work of separating for? Nothing. Consider failed recycling plan as possible metaphor for all of life. Desist. Wonder if you should thank staff by saying gracias or thank you. Wonder if she'll pick up on your extreme adeptness in multiple languages or consider you condescending. Settle on thanks. Consider that she may not really care.

9:23 Consider that people keep telling you that their plans for Halloween are going to a party. Feel old. Consider getting more friends in their sixties/people who's idea of a good Halloween is putting out a bowl with six candy bars split in half, turning off all the lights in the house and reading a book underneath a blanket with a flashlight to prevent anyone from knowing you're home.

9:37 Visit with a co-worker. Admire the pictures of the haunted house she's help construct to get kids excited about coming to college. Try and avoid confusion over concept, I thought kids enjoyed freedom and booze? Do they like haunted houses? Point out that it's probably not best to have photos of staff in home made ghost outfits primarily because we already scored low on diversity initiatives and white people in sheets isn't the best way to help fix that.