Game of Thrones: The breaker of chains and saver of budgets
Unlike
a typical Game of Thrones episode the action in this episode picks up right
where the last one left off (as if we needed any more proof that it’s really a
ten hour movie as opposed to individual episodes) with Cersei shrieking at
Tyrion and Sansa for killing her beloved Joffry. Admittedly, we were all upset
with the death of one of televisions greatest villains, but not nearly as
agitated as Miss Lannister.
And thus ends, in rather rapid fashion, the mystery of who
poisoned the king. Note: what’s the point in being king if you can’t even have
a wedding without getting murdered? Twyin goes on to Tommin for a
bit about the litany of dead kings before pitching himself as the man to trust.
If I was Tommin I’d be asking if I could just get a job on the small council
like Varus or maybe as a seamstress or something. What’s the life expectancy
for a seamstress on GOT? Notes the Hound saying the people will be dead by
winter. Okay, maybe a maester is the way to go. The king was poisoned by
Littlefinger, which should have been at least on the radar. You don’t just get
a whole voice over scene talking about chaos allowing you to climb the ladder
only to disappear to Dorne for eternity, especially not with that pencil
mustache. We’re all feeling good for Sansa now safe from the arms of Joffry and
into the hands of Littlefinger. I’m guessing she ends up with the bastard son
of Roose Bolton, but I guess we’ll see. Fingers crossed.
In terms of plot lines, is it even vaguely reasonable to question
the development of Tyrion as the murderer? I mean, is someone besides Tyrion
going to point out how unlikely it is that he’d poison the king so brazenly? It
was heartwarming to have Pod try and stand by his man one more time without any
mention of his sexual prowess.
However, the sexual prowess rod of power is now firmly in the eh,
hands of Oberon. If there is one thing that I’ve learned about Oberon during
his brief stay in King’s Landing it’s that he’s a sexual libertine. In case
you’d forgotten after the first episode, GOT chose to have him engaging in
sexual congress with no less than five other people, or as I like to call it,
never. Despite the fact that GOT has taken some flack for its not exactly even
handed presentation of the female body and sexuality it doesn't seem like its
changing soon. This episode was more egalitarian in terms of providing some
male nudity as well. Note: though appointing Oberon a judge and trying to win
over the Dornish people seems like a good move wouldn’t Tywin be a little more
concerned about putting someone who wishes him dead on a court that he hopes to
rule over? I mean, Tyrion has a way out now. Do they have hung juries in
Westeros. This was not a pun.
Speaking of which, the story of the Mother of Dragons takes yet
another similar turn as she arrives at the gates of a city that looks like a
small scale replica of Egypt. As any student of history knows, cultures that
develop around scant resources, particularly water, generally rely on slave
labor and have authoritarian rule. Dany is no student of history though, so she
continues to blame them for their ways. Note: Why are all the slaves allowed to
sit around listen to her talk anyway? Aren’t these people supposed to be
working? It seems like these masters were already being a bit slack. But the
real moment of freedom is when she catapults chains over the walls to encourage
the slaves to become free. It’s inspiring, and a new take on her similar story.
However, whence the dragons? If I had three dragons in my army
they’d be circling me at all times, raining down bits of fire or pouring tea or
whatever, just because, dragons. In Dany’s case, the budget holds her back, and
I understand that limitation, but couldn’t she at least have afforded one
dragon to burn the champion of the city to ash?
And now we need to talk about the champion of the city. A man who
parades around on his horse for roughly ten minutes while everyone cheers,
these shots all take place from far away, and we never really get a shot of our
erstwhile champion, except the underside of his penis as he pees on the ground.
Note: Does this guy get an actual credit in the episode, or do you think he had
a penis double? As breakthroughs go this was probably not his moment in the sun
as he remained entirely obscured and was cut down in a cloud of dust by Dario
Naharis, warrior poet in rather quick fashion. Would the old Dario Naharis have
resorted to a knife? Probably not. He would have pulled the man off his horse
and bear hugged him to death and then taken off his shirt. New Dario is probably
writing a poem about it. Alas.
And, further in the alas category comes the tale of some of our
characters who had developed in complexity and began to become fuller human
beings took a step in the wrong direction. Full confession, having Jamie rape
his sister at the foot of his dead son's grave was a bit of a step down from
the honor bound man we saw lying to save Breanne. Perhaps we could have pruned
that scene away from the narrative, or perhaps we're just okay with
necrophiliac incest type stuff.
The Hound and Arya continued their delightful journey, however, it
once again ended with them leaving with all the chickens. Though in this case
the chickens were pieces of silver taken from a farmer and perhaps the advice
the Hound gave wasn't the worst thing in the world, reminding Arya that
complexity is a part of life and that she should avoid having her head cut off
if possible. His raw pragmatism in robbing a farmer and his young daughter
isn't exactly laudable, but it's not as reprehensible either, (except that Arya
was beginning to like him :().
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