1) Dreams can come true. No really. You know that dream you had where you showed up at work in your underwear but that kid you used to sit next to in second grade was in your cube, and also, your boss turned out to be someone who was some sort of amalgamation between your mom and your third cousin. Dreams can come true. It's just unlikely that they will.
2) People who try and interpret dreams are bat shi- crazy. This is one of those things that turns out to be true throughout all cultures and times. Most societies have created elaborate positions for people to interpret dreams solely so that Phd candidates can have something to write about for five years at a time.
3) Recurring dreams are a sign that you're going insane. A lot of people are like, "Oh, I keep having this dream about my teeth falling out" and stuff, and some people will try to convince you that it's your subconscious trying to help you process some important stuff in your life. As it turns out, having a recurring dream is just a sign that you might be insane.
4) Dreams are weird. I mean, why did the janitor in that dream have the body of a regular janitor but the head of a bald eagle. WTF subconscious?
5) It's impossible to control your dreams. Anyone who accidentally watched the Nightmare on Elm Street movies at too young of an age due to some weird neighborhood parents with equally strange kids, knows that you can't really control your dreams without a guy with a messed up face and long razors for hands showing up to murder you. It's best just to let the dreams do their thing.
6) Dreams don't actually happen at all. People just like to have things to talk about in the morning, or during a boring time at work. Dreams are your mind's way of faking that your night of sleep has been more interesting than it actually has been. I mean, nobody likes talking in the morning, it's the morning. That's why your conscious minds makes up these elaborate and weird things like you gave birth to a panda bear in a dream just to keep you interested in sleeping, otherwise we'd all just take meth.
7) Anytime someone says to you, "Hey, I had a dream last night" it's best to answer with, "How was I?" This joke is timeless and home or office appropriate.
8) The most common type of dream is that you're an ancient Egyptian pharaoh accidentally sealed in a giant pyramid with 900 cats. Apparently this dream is shared across cultures and time.
9) I remember about two dreams a year, so I'm guessing that that's about how many dreams the average person has per year. Two. Science.
why was the issue of length of dream not addressed??
ReplyDeletesome dreams seem to last seconds and others seem to take a hour or more..what is the significance of that??
why do we remember some dreams vividly and others we cannot recall at all??
why did i wake up one time with fists clenched
and swinging at my cat??
so in conclusion...how was i??